When I went in for my 16 week appointment, my doctor asked if my dates could be off. I told her there was no way, I was absolutely certain of our dates. She asked me to come back later that week to get an ultrasound. I had a suspicion of what she was thinking, and suggested "how about if I come back later today for the ultrasound?" The idea of waiting and wondering for several days did not sound fun. Thankfully, they scheduled me to come back in that afternoon. I called my husband, Dan, and told him I needed to have an ultrasound to "check my dates.” I tried to make it sound like it was no big deal so as not to alarm him. I was really trying to convince myself that this wasn’t happening. He caught me off guard when he said he was going to leave work and would be there in a little bit for the ultrasound. Noah and I went back to the doctor’s that afternoon for the ultrasound. After getting situated on the table, the ultrasound tech said, "There's the heart beating...and there's another one." I was speechless. Was this really happening? Two babies?! There was a knock on the door. It was Dan. I was in shock, so I asked the tech to tell him. She showed him the heart beating and then the other one as well. Dan’s jaw dropped.
During the next 4 weeks we shared the news with family and friends while I tried to process the news for myself. The idea of twins had always scared me. I didn’t think I could handle it. Twins sounded overwhelming. I am a person who enjoys quiet, peace, order, organization and control. You know the kind. I like my towels all folded in the same direction, the dishwasher loaded a certain way, my closet organized by length of sleeve and color all on white hangers. I knew my world was about to be turned upside down. I was going to have to let go of striving for a neat, organized house. Little did I know, just how much stretching God had in store for me. A season of growing and trusting was on the horizon. It took a LOT of soaking in.
With our first pregnancy, we did not want to know if we were having a boy or a girl because I love surprises. We decided to wait. I thought of it like, not wanting to open a Christmas present until Christmas morning. However, after finding out we were going to have twins, we decided that was enough of a surprise and now we wanted to know their gender. So at my regular 20 week ultrasound appointment, we found out we were having 2 girls! My OB told me we needed to go to see a specialist, a perinatologist, because there were some concerns about their size discrepancies.
Off we went to meet with the perinatologist. As he sat so seriously behind his desk, he told us our babies had Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome (TTTS), a rare syndrome that occurs in less than 0.1-0.9 in 1,000 births. The prognosis was poor since it presented itself so early in the pregnancy. The doctors were going to do their best but admitted that there is still so much to TTTS that they do not understand. I was to go on bedrest from here on out and they would monitor the girls weekly. The appointment was somber. I went from feelings of shock, to begging God to save both of our little girls.
Our Story will continue next week.